Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Ladies, Please

In an attempt to jump start some kind of creative thought I turned to Yen's blog and came across THIS POST about her time in Texas. Not only did it further my jealousy of all the ladies who went to the TSCC Conference, but it also made me think about the complexities of the girl - girl relationship. That, coupled with the ups and downs I've experienced among my own friendships in the past several months, well it all just seems so complicated.
I've been able to very openly share my thoughts, feelings, quirks, downfalls, successes etc. with an almost entirely female audience for the better part of a year. And everyone has been so lovely, both online, and the ladies I've been lucky enough to hug in person. But in my everyday life experiences the way women treat other women still isn't all it's cracked up to be. We can be downright hurtful to one another.
One of the hardest things I've had to learn is that you can't expect other people to treat you the way you would treat them. It just doesn't happen. Everyone thinks differently and handles situations with their own set of baggage that is entirely different than your own. And while I'm not at the point where those discrepancies in treatment aren't hurtful, I'm trying to be at the place where I take a moment to vent (sorry Twitter, but thanks Twitter friends) and breath before I react directly. I've always been the type of person who needs a few hours, or days, to figure out exactly how I feel and why before I can communicate that to the other person. I'm not sure if this makes having girl friends more difficult or less difficult but it's just how I've always been.
Sunglasses from Sucre, Vest & Pants from Madewell, found socks
Old Riding Boots, Vintage Shirt from Tree & Kimball Market, Necklace from Clyde's Rebirth

Basically the female - female relationship is complex. I'm glad I've become (if I may be so bold) a part of such a supportive group of women through this community. I've met so many amazing ladies who have helped me more than they, you, could imagine through some of the roughest parts of this past year. Which is why I'm stuck wondering if some of these girl relationships can be so honest, fulfilling, sympathetic, rewarding, then why are others so convoluted, touchy, precarious, confusing? 
Something about this outfit felt so Jen Loves Kev meets My Edit to me. I couldn't exactly put my finger on what it was though. Maybe it was something from past posts of theirs that's bubbling up in my subconscious. Whatever it was, I will say that it made me feel especially great wearing it.
I posted an extra photo on my Tumblr because I am actually happy these days and just thought I'd show you that I really do know how to smile!



Caroline said...

This is one of my favorite outfits I have seen you post. I love the soft colors, your boots, the necklace and the vest with a simple ruffles. You truly have the best style. Thoroughly enjoy reading this blog of yours. XO!

Sweet Laundry said...

I really love this post because I feel the exact same way about girl-girl relationships. It's hard when other people, especially girls, don't approach situations the same way as I do. Sometimes I feel frustrated when I do something for someone that I know wouldn't do the same for me. I buy so many gifts and attend so many functions for other people, and then when it comes to something I'm organizing, it's just not a priority for them. Maybe I'm too laid back, I don't know, but it hurts. I have no idea what to do about it.

Anyway, sorry for the rant, but aside from that I really enjoy this outfit. I always love seeing you wear items from Madewell because I adore that store so much but the clothes are just not within my reach. And you always have the best necklaces :)

Cayce said...

why is it that friendships can be so hard to maintain? i have seen several friendships in my own life come and go due to changes in life and other various reasons. and i just chalk it up to the idea that particular girl was in my life for a particular season of life or to serve a purpose and once that was fulfilled, we moved on. when it comes down to it, us girls are just emotional and someone's feelings are inevitably going to get hurt. the positive light is that it seems you are learning a ton about who you are and what is valuable in a friendship/relationship to you. :)
can we talk about that shirt? because it looks like it was made for you! the pairing with the neutral and ruffles..looks like you stepped out of an anthropologie catalogue!

andrea k (blonde bedhead) said...

I LOVE THIS!!! I love the colors, especially the pop of color with the socks. You look great and this is some definite inspiration for me as I dress myself for spring.

Santina said...

The female - female relationship is complex, to the say the least. I'll be the first one to admit that I spent most of my life being the girl with almost all guy friends. I've always found friendships with guys to be so much easier...so much less emotionally draining. All that said, blogging has made me feel like I have a million (okay, not a million) girlfriends, and sometimes when I think about it, it blows my mind.

I wish I could be more like you, Morgan, and process and consider events before reacting, but I am the complete opposite. Immediate reactions seem to be the only kind I have!

On a different note: I absolutely love these photos. That first one might be my favorite shot of you...ever! (Well, except for that one of your feet with Lua's that I featured on my blog way back when!) I love the pop of color from your red socks - awesome!


Between Laundry Days said...

Oh, Morgan. How is it that your posts always strike such a chord with me. I have been thinking about this for a long time. Female relationships have always been really difficult for me, and I'm not sure that I've ever really figured out how to do it properly. All the online friendship stuff has added such an interesting element to the whole thing, and though I don't know that I've figured all that out yet either, it's been overall an incredibly positive, supportive experience. Thank you for this lovely post.

Also, I adore this outfit. I will absolutely be recreating it soon. :)

Caroline said...

Just added your sweet blog to my sidebar as I love love this blog of yours. And YES, you would LOVE Portland!! XO!

SarahAnn said...

Sigh. I know.
I'm glad we don't do this to each other. :)

Elaine Robinson said...

I love this post. I take a while to make friends as I have been completely blindsided and hurt by behaviour of some of my 'friends' in the past, yes they were females.

I also love the pink socks!

myedit said...

Whoooo... back from the snow clearing coma!
Firstly, flattered for the reference... I feel like there are many things I subconsciously reference from you... especially the sock and boot thing... haha.
Ok, girl friendships are certainly a complicated thing. Personally, I love girl friends... I have never been that girl who ditches her friends when a boy hits the scene. It usually the opposite... but Matt doesn't mind. Which is why I like Matt... anyways, I feel like my whole life I have invested more into my freinds than they have invested in me. And I hate that that gives me a chip on my shoulder about friendships. As stupid as this sounds, I wish some of my friends would even feign interest in my blog, it is a big part of my life, though I get that not everyone understands it... But I ask about their babies and discuss breastfeeding, can they not ask about my blog?
I am going off topic here... Regardless, I just wanna say I got your back;)...You're a good one, i can tell...

jessie said...

wow. first of all, i can totally relate to what you're saying here, as i've gone through a bit of rockiness with my girlfriends over the past year and a half or so. (mainly stemming from the fact that most of them have had a child in the past few months, and my husband and i are still QUITE a ways off from entering that life stage - if ever!) anyways, this is my first time ever visiting your blog, which is kind of funny since it appears as though we have lots of mutual bloggy-friends (here by way of merly-girl, if i remember correctly)! i love the fact that you are willing to be so honest in your writing. :) and added bonus: your style is amazing!! i can't wait to add you to my reader and follow along with both your life adventures and your fabulous style. XOXO

back to top